Please Call Me Luis

Written by: Jim Canup

What happens when “Luis Cypher” shows up at the door, offering more than just decorating advice? In this short but powerful drama, temptation sneaks into a Christian home—dressed sharp, sounding persuasive, and aiming straight at the family’s faith. Please Call Me Luis reminds us that the enemy doesn’t come with horns and a pitchfork, but with charm and compromise.

• Run-Time: 6 minutes
• Cast Number: 4 (1 Male, 1 Female, 2 Girls ages 8–12)
• Biblical Reference: Matthew 7:24–27, Matthew 6:1–5, Matthew 5:14–16
• Setting: A typical household
• Props: Table, business card, headphones, playing cards, telephone, Girl Scout cookies, moving box, plaque, contract, ink pen

Sample Script

(Marie and her daughter are standing at the table (center stage) playing the card game Slap Jack. They are laughing and having a genuinely great time together when the doorbell rings).
[SFX: Doorbell Ring]

Marie: Ok sweetie. That would be the decorator I called about the bonus room. You play here quietly while I talk to him.

Daughter: Yes, ma’am.

(Marie crosses to stage left to the imaginary door where Luis is standing facing upstage. The daughter places headphones on her head and starts building a house of cards. She continues working on the house of cards until the very end. Marie opens the door and greets Luis.)

Marie: Hello.

Luis: Good day madam, we have an appointment to discuss redecorating your home. (Produces a business card with a flourish) My card.

Marie: (Reading from the card) Mr. Cypher (pronouncing it as Cy-fer)?

Luis: Cypher to be exact, but please, call me Luis.

Marie: Please come in. (They cross to stage right. Marie speaks as they’re walking.) Actually, I am only interested in redecorating the bonus room. Right now it is just a storage room. You see we’re getting more involved at church and we will be hosting a weekly bible study group here in our home. I thought this room would be the perfect place to hold the meetings.

Luis: (Looking around pantomiming as if he is examining things.) This room is very small and it is so far from the nucleus of the house. It is almost like you are tucking your guests into a corner. I am sure that is not how you meant it, but you have such a lovely house. It would be such a pity to waste it. You know what they say – waste not want not!

Marie: Oh, I never thought about it that way.

Luis: This room speaks to me as a place of organization, solitude and how you say… business dealings. Do you hear it?

Marie: Well actually, my husband did mention when we first moved in that this would make a great home office. But he works so much already. When he comes home he just likes to spend time with our daughter looking over her homework, talking about school, and those kinds of things. You know?

Luis: Ah, yes I do know. Nurturing our children is so very important. But what is more important is their future. With an office here at home, your husband can do some work on the weekends or after your daughter goes to bed to further his career. That way he can make more money and send your precious daughter to the best universities that money can buy. Maybe you will be able to send her to that private school just up the street.

Marie: Wow. How do you know that we wanted to send her to private school?

Luis: A lucky guess. But with so many other children in your neighborhood going there, I just thought she would like to be with her friends.

Marie: That would be nice. But if we turn this room into an office, where would the bible study group meet?

Luis: Follow me. (With a hand gesture, Luis walks to center stage and starts to speak when the telephone rings.)
[SFX: Telephone Ring]

Marie: I am sorry Mr. Cypher that’s probably my husband calling. This will only take a minute.

Luis: (With a wave of his hand.) That is quite all right and please, call me Luis.

Marie: (Smiles and nods to Luis as she picks up the phone.) Hello? Hi honey… yes the decorator is here now…
[SFX: Doorbell Ring] (The doorbell rings and Marie yells towards the daughter.) Sweetie, can you get the door? Mommy is on the phone with daddy. (Marie turns to face upstage and only mimes talking on the phone).

(The daughter has her headphones on and is intently building her house of cards. She doesn’t hear her mother. Luis crosses and answers the door where there is a Girl Scout in her uniform.)

Luis: Yes?

Girl Scout: (Happy and enthusiastic) Good morning sir! I am with Girl Scout Troop—

Luis: (Interrupting in a menacing voice) NO! I do not want any Girl Scout cookies and I want you to leave and never come to this house again! Do you understand me?

(The Girl Scout backs away and nods with a frightened look on her face. Luis closes the door and turns around with a smile on his face just in time to meet Marie who is now off the phone.)

Marie: I am so sorry about all that. Who was that at the door?

Luis: Oh just some door-to-door salesperson. You know, I have a friend in the security business that can give you a good price on a perimeter fence to keep such undesirables away. You have worked very hard for this beautiful house and you should be able to enjoy your privacy here.

Marie: (Frustrated.) They come all the time. I think they know we just moved in. We must be on some list of theirs. Before you leave, I’ll get your friend’s number and my husband can give him a call. He just might be interested in a fence.

Luis: Very good. Now back to your house and your weekly entertainment needs.

Marie: Bible study group.

Luis: Yes, but you are the hostess, are you not? I am sure you will be a most wonderful hostess.

(Luis walks down stage just in front of the table and on the way he notices a moving box sitting next to the table with a plaque in it. He picks up the plaque, dusts it off and reads it.)

Luis: A special thank you to Joe and Marie Smith from the County Homeless Shelter. This is nice. There are several in this box. Do you make donations to them?

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