The Sardinians

Comedy based on the church in Sardis. A hockey team has some good players giving a strong and committed effort but also some who are no longer putting in the effort it takes to win in the big game.

Cast: 4 or more, female or male

Set: Set is to represent the players bench at a ice hockey game. Actors are squeezed in close together.

Sound: Taped sounds of whistle blowing, crowd noise, applause

Costumes: Hockey jerseys.

Special Instructions: An important part of this drama is to “act and react” as hockey players. Watch live or televised action of a hockey game and see how players will watch / react as the play moves from one end of the ice to another, will react when a goal is scored for them or against them, and particularly watch the gliding action as players skate. This kind of mimed action is critical to the believability of the drama.
Note that although this drama is written with an ice hockey theme, it could be modified to be any sport such as soccer, football, basketball or virtually any team sport.

Props: Hockey equipment, sticks, etc., piece of paper

Sample of script:

Players “skate” on stage, shouting encouragement to each other, take their seats on the bench, Coach follows, stands behind the players

Rookie: Let’s go Sardines!

Alice: Excuse me Rookie, the team name is . . Sardinians! As in the ice hockey team sponsored by Sardinian Manufacturing Company.

Amanda: Might better call us “Sardines” at that, the way we are packed into this player’s bench! . . I mean can’t they afford decent rinks for us to play in? . . . After all we are a semi-pro hockey team!

Rookie: I know that this will make me sound like a rookie, . . which I am . . but what does semi-pro mean anyhow?

Alice: Means we are highly skilled and trained athletes, stars who are paid to come to the rink and keep all these fans on the edge of their seats, that’s what semi-pro means, Rookie!

Amanda: I doubt that getting free all-you-can-eat ribs once a year at the Greasy Spoon All Night Diner qualifies us as semi-pro.

Rookie, looks around: Can I ask a question Amanda, when do the fans show up? . . And who are the stars on this team anyways?

Alice: I will have you know that I am Alice Smith, or as the world knows me . . . Slapshot Smith.

Amanda: You mean . . the world used to know you!. . . Been years since your slapshot caused goalies sleepless nights.

Alice, pulls out a piece of paper: Care to read my lifetime stats, you, . . you, . . . (contemptuously) . . hockey player wannabe, Amanda Adams! . . You just might notice that I led the league in goals and assists three years ago!

Amanda: And since then . . . nothing!

Alice: Well I have been in a bit of a scoring drought the last little bit . . but I will bounce back, old Slapshot has still got it I tell you!

Coach: Will you guys cut out the talk and get your heads into the game!

Players watch as the play goes back and forth “on the ice”

Rookie: Oh man! . . The other team has a 3 on 1 break on our net! . . Puck’s in front of our net! . . Clear it out of there guys! . . . Oh rats!. . . They scored!

players react in disappointment

Alice: What ever is going through their mind? . . Our goalie is playing like a sieve . . every shot that goes her way goes right through her!

Coach: Nothing wrong with how Henderson is playing, we just need to help her out playing the puck in our own end. . . . Something you neglected to do in our last game as I recall Alice!

Alice: How come Patricia’s line is out there, they are always on the ice, how come we don’t get first shift?

Coach: Because Patricia and her line are our best players, they are giving their all, and they give us our best shot at winning this game.

Alice: May I remind you that when I . . Slapshot Smith . . came to this team I was called “The Franchise” . .. I was the face of this team.

Coach: I am aware of the past Alice, and I it breaks my heart that lately you have rested on your laurels, you are out of shape, and you don’t train hard enough to keep up to the better players.

Alice, hurt: “Better players?” . . . Just a minute here! . . If that’s what you think of my talents then maybe I just go join another team! . . Tons of teams would trade their next three years draft picks to get me on their squad I will have you know!

Coach: No one questions your talents Alice, you proved in the past what you can do if you set your mind to it. . . But in the last couple of years you haven’t put in the effort, seems like you’ve been too busy reading your press clippings to get down to work, keep your talents to the level that you know are needed in this league.

Alice, pouts: Well I have been playing hurt you know!

Coach: A broken finger nail doesn’t count as a serious injury Alice.

The complete script, plus all 2,000 other DramaShare scripts, are available at no charge to DramaShare members, non-members may purchase the individual script.

Comedy based on the church in Sardis. A hockey team has some good players giving a strong and committed effort but also some who are no longer putting in the effort it takes to win in the big game.

Cast: 4 or more, female or male

Set: Set is to represent the players bench at a ice hockey game. Actors are squeezed in close together.

Sound: Taped sounds of whistle blowing, crowd noise, applause

Costumes: Hockey jerseys.

Special Instructions: An important part of this drama is to “act and react” as hockey players. Watch live or televised action of a hockey game and see how players will watch / react as the play moves from one end of the ice to another, will react when a goal is scored for them or against them, and particularly watch the gliding action as players skate. This kind of mimed action is critical to the believability of the drama.
Note that although this drama is written with an ice hockey theme, it could be modified to be any sport such as soccer, football, basketball or virtually any team sport.

Props: Hockey equipment, sticks, etc., piece of paper

Sample of script:

Players “skate” on stage, shouting encouragement to each other, take their seats on the bench, Coach follows, stands behind the players

Rookie: Let’s go Sardines!

Alice: Excuse me Rookie, the team name is . . Sardinians! As in the ice hockey team sponsored by Sardinian Manufacturing Company.

Amanda: Might better call us “Sardines” at that, the way we are packed into this player’s bench! . . I mean can’t they afford decent rinks for us to play in? . . . After all we are a semi-pro hockey team!

Rookie: I know that this will make me sound like a rookie, . . which I am . . but what does semi-pro mean anyhow?

Alice: Means we are highly skilled and trained athletes, stars who are paid to come to the rink and keep all these fans on the edge of their seats, that’s what semi-pro means, Rookie!

Amanda: I doubt that getting free all-you-can-eat ribs once a year at the Greasy Spoon All Night Diner qualifies us as semi-pro.

Rookie, looks around: Can I ask a question Amanda, when do the fans show up? . . And who are the stars on this team anyways?

Alice: I will have you know that I am Alice Smith, or as the world knows me . . . Slapshot Smith.

Amanda: You mean . . the world used to know you!. . . Been years since your slapshot caused goalies sleepless nights.

Alice, pulls out a piece of paper: Care to read my lifetime stats, you, . . you, . . . (contemptuously) . . hockey player wannabe, Amanda Adams! . . You just might notice that I led the league in goals and assists three years ago!

Amanda: And since then . . . nothing!

Alice: Well I have been in a bit of a scoring drought the last little bit . . but I will bounce back, old Slapshot has still got it I tell you!

Coach: Will you guys cut out the talk and get your heads into the game!

Players watch as the play goes back and forth “on the ice”

Rookie: Oh man! . . The other team has a 3 on 1 break on our net! . . Puck’s in front of our net! . . Clear it out of there guys! . . . Oh rats!. . . They scored!

players react in disappointment

Alice: What ever is going through their mind? . . Our goalie is playing like a sieve . . every shot that goes her way goes right through her!

Coach: Nothing wrong with how Henderson is playing, we just need to help her out playing the puck in our own end. . . . Something you neglected to do in our last game as I recall Alice!

Alice: How come Patricia’s line is out there, they are always on the ice, how come we don’t get first shift?

Coach: Because Patricia and her line are our best players, they are giving their all, and they give us our best shot at winning this game.

Alice: May I remind you that when I . . Slapshot Smith . . came to this team I was called “The Franchise” . .. I was the face of this team.

Coach: I am aware of the past Alice, and I it breaks my heart that lately you have rested on your laurels, you are out of shape, and you don’t train hard enough to keep up to the better players.

Alice, hurt: “Better players?” . . . Just a minute here! . . If that’s what you think of my talents then maybe I just go join another team! . . Tons of teams would trade their next three years draft picks to get me on their squad I will have you know!

Coach: No one questions your talents Alice, you proved in the past what you can do if you set your mind to it. . . But in the last couple of years you haven’t put in the effort, seems like you’ve been too busy reading your press clippings to get down to work, keep your talents to the level that you know are needed in this league.

Alice, pouts: Well I have been playing hurt you know!

Coach: A broken finger nail doesn’t count as a serious injury Alice.

The complete script, plus all 2,000 other DramaShare scripts, are available at no charge to DramaShare members, non-members may purchase the individual script.