Teach Them To Pray

We can talk to God at any time, about anything, and in many ways.

This skit has an army camp training session feel to it, and much humor! Talks of getting instructions regarding prayer.

Cast: 3

• Lieutenant, m or f
• McAllister, female
• Benjamin, m or f

Bible Reference: Matthew 6:9-13

Set: standard

Sound: wireless mics if available

Song: none

Lighting: standard

SFX: none

Props: none

Costumes:

• military if possible

Special Instructions: none

Time: 15

Sample of script:

Scene opens: The Lieutenant stands in front of a group of fresh recruits. McAllister is among them, standing with an air of confidence.

Lieutenant: OK, listen up here! You guys are in the army now, so get with the program. I am your commanding officer, and it’s my job to whip you recruit guys into line.

McAllister: Excuse me, sir . . . . .

Lieutenant: Recruit, did I request your comments?

McAllister: No, you didn’t, sir, but that’s OK, I forgive you. We all make mistakes. What I wanted to know was . . .

Lieutenant: Mistakes? Look here, let’s get one thing straight. As your commanding officer, I do not—let me repeat—do not make mistakes!

McAllister (patronizing): There, there! Of course you do. We all make mistakes. Anyhow, what I was about to say when you interrupted was . . .

Lieutenant: Interrupted? You—a recruit—with almost, (checks watch) almost twenty minutes of service in this man’s army . . .

McAllister (annoyed): Excuse me! Man’s army? I shall have you know that . . .

Lieutenant: Recruit . . . what’s your name?

McAllister: Mary Jean McAllister, thanks for askin’.

Lieutenant: Soldier McAllister! May I . . .

McAllister: No, sir, you may not. When spoken to, I will be addressed by the name my momma gave me—Mary Jean. Did you know that my name is the combination of the given names of my great-grandmommas on my momma’s side of the family, and that . . .

Lieutenant: That is quite enough! Judging by the looks of you guys, I’m not sure how you plan on becoming soldiers. Maybe I can teach you how you can have a prayer . . .

McAllister: Oh, that’s OK, sir, I know all about prayin’. My daddy—he’s the senior pastor at Light of the Mornin’ Dew Community Outreach to Worship His Holy Name All Saints Healin’ Bible Church in Franklin’s Ford Creek, West Virginia. He makes it his business to teach every person who walks through the door at Mornin’ Dew Community Outreach to Worship His Holy Name All Saints Healin’ Bible Church to learn to pray real good. Don’t matter they be old grandmas, grandpas, hundred years old or more, or if they be little bitty babies—no matter at all—they gonna be down on their knees, a-prayin’ is what they will do. So don’t you be worryin’ about teachin’ me about prayer—no need for that here. Perhaps you can spend extra time on these folks, (looks at other recruits, lowers voice as an aside) likely some heathens among them is my best guess.

Lieutenant: Are you quite finished, soldier?

McAllister: I am, for real, I am. And let me tell you, sir, I am so impressed with your good manners. I was driven to believe that you army fellers was loud and obnoxious, but you surely have chased those ideas to roost in the tall branches, I tell you.

Lieutenant: Another five minutes here, and it’s me that’s gonna be needing prayer.

McAllister: Say not another word—I will set straight to prayin’ for you. Will put you on the Prayer Wall back at my church is what I will do. Prayin’ man, are you, soldier?

Lieutenant: Lieutenant.

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