Solidly on the Fence

Introducing . . . Freddie. Whatever you are for, or against, Freddie will back you one hundred percent.

That is, until someone else says something different. A comedy which gives the message: "If you don't stand for something you will fall for anything." Choose friends that won't lead you astray, and trust the word of God to provide guidelines for life.

Cast: 4 m or f

• Freddie the fence sitter
• Tracy
• Pam
• Lyn

Bible Reference:

• Ephesians 4:25
• Proverbs 12:19

Set: standard

Sound: wireless mics if available

Song: none

Lighting: standard

SFX: none

Props: coat hanger

Costumes: standard

Special Instructions: none

Time: 10

Sample of script:

(Freddie is sitting at center stage. Other actors enter, but Freddie doesn’t notice them.)

Tracy: Hey guys, there’s Freddie the fence sitter.

Pam: “Fence sitter”? What does that mean?

Lyn: Whatever you are for, or against, Freddie will back you one hundred percent.

Tracy: That is, until someone else says something different.

Pam: Seriously? You mean he will switch sides that easily?

Lyn: Easier than that, actually.

Pam: Amazing! I have never seen anyone who did that.

Tracy: Lots of people do that.

Lyn: But none quite as obvious as Freddie the fence sitter.

Tracy: Hey guys, what say we have some fun?

Pam: What kinda fun?

Tracy: You guys stay here, outta sight. I’m gonna go have a chat with... Freddie. First, I need a... something.

Pam: A something?

Tracy (looking around): Yeah, a something... an anything. (sees a coat hanger on a table, smiles, picks it up) This will work just fine!

Pam: An old coat hanger?

Tracy: To the world, this may be a coat hanger, but to Freddie the fence sitter, this could be... actually anything I say it is. Now you guys stay here and be real quiet while I go have some fun!

(Pam and Lyn stay in the corner, watching. Tracy takes the coat hanger, holds it upside down, swinging it back and forth. Meanwhile, Tracy’s index finger of the other hand is pointed upward, and Tracy is looking in that direction. Freddie starts watching Tracy, but Tracy ignores him. Finally, Freddie speaks.)

Freddie: Uh, excuse me, Tracy, but mind if I ask what you are doing?

(Tracy totally ignores Freddie, now starts looking at wristwatch.)

Tracy (continues to look at watch): Five, ten, fifteen, twenty, twenty-five, thirty...

Freddie (taps Tracy on the shoulder): Excuse me. What are you doing with the coat hanger?

Tracy (angry): Well, thanks a lot, Freddie! You just blew my experiment! Likely it will be another eighteen years before Mars and Neptune are lined up perfectly!

Freddie (looks upward): You can tell from that coat hanger that Mars and Neptune are...

Tracy (frustrated): “Coat hanger”?! You would dare call my Sonic Orbiter Relational Transcriber a... coat hanger?! Well, I am...

Freddie: A Sonic Relative... what...?

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