Robert Rules

Roberts Rules of Parliamentary Procedure this is not, silly elections vote

Cast: 3 m or f

• Billybob
• Fredrick
• Tracy

Bible Reference: Exodus 18:25

Set: standard

Sound: wireless mics if available

Song: none

Lighting: standard

SFX: none

Props: none

Costumes: standard

Special Instructions: none

Time: 30

Sample of script:

Billybob: Hey, there ol’ buddy, and what’s happenin’?

Fredrick, kind of shocked, shows he doesn’t know Billybob: Oh, ahh, hi, ahh, how are you today?

Billybob: First class is all! First class! And how’s the wife, kids?

Fredrick, shocked, offended: Uhhhh, I am not married, certainly no children!

Billybob: You’re sure?

Fredrick: Never been more sure on anything. Uhh, sorry, but I really must be on my way, I have to . . .

Billybob: Coulda swore you were that guy lives in the orange and yellow duplex on Thornton Avenue, wife wears this big purple hat with a feather. Sure that’s not you?

Fredrick: It actually gives me a great sense of pride and relief to say I am definitely not! Now, if you don’t mind I must be .

Billybob: Don’t like duplex houses I take it? I live in a duplex just down the street from you on Thornton Avenue, kinda like duplex livin’, I do.

Fredrick, getting angry: For the last time, I do not live on Thornton Avenue! I would not wish to live in a duplex on Thornton Avenue!

Billybob: Really? But, can’t really say I blame you, I mean, we in the Duplex Urban Management Bureau, we do have our struggles, gotta admit it.

Fredrick: Duplex Urban Manageme. . . . . .?

Billybob: Duplex Urban Management Bureau. Us guys who live in the Thornton Avenue duplex housing unit, we set up this association to look after our concerns. Since then D.U.M.B has represented us.

Fredrick: But, D.U.M.B. spells . . . dumb.

Billybob: Exactly what some of the duplex folks said early on. But since we got D.U.M.B. fired up I want to tell you we have made believers out of D.U.M.B. people, we most surely have!

Fredrick: I know I will be sorry for asking but what kind of things does D.U.M.B. do for their members?

Billybob: No need to feel bad one little bit, why just like us folks in D.U.M.B. always say, there’s no dumb questions in D.U.M.B. So, you just ask away there Homer!

Fredrick: . . . Fredrick, name is Fredrick.

Billybob: You sure? Coulda swore your name was Homer.

Fredrick: It’s Fredrick, take it to the bank.

Billybob: Well, at D.U.M.B. we make important decisions, who’s to mow the middle part of the lawn, who paints the fence, who is responsible for the chewing gum on the sidewalk, who organizes the annual “Duplexers For A Better World Rally and Muffin Bake.”

Fredrick: Makes me wonder who is in charge of this dumb organization and just . .

Billybob, spells it out: D.U.M.B. We prefer to call it D.U.M.B.

Fredrick: Couldn’t agree more with your choice.

Billybob: Speaking of who is in charge, here comes Tracy, the D.U.M.B. AICGFAW.

Tracy comes on stage

Fredrick: AICF . . . ?

Tracy: Hey Billybob. That’s me, I am the D.U.M.B. AICGFAW. Acting In Charge Guy For A While.

Fredrick: That is truly dumb.

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