Pain Free Travel

This is a comedy sketch promoting a missions conference. A wife is on the phone talking to a friend about the upcoming missions conference and the places where the missionaries are coming from. The husband enters in the middle of the phone conversation and believes they have come into a lot of money, and that his wife is going to surprise him with a whirlwind holiday around the world. As the wife talks of the different countries the husband mimes “putting on” the feelings, music, activities (dances) of the region, then “taking off” that activity and “packing it” in a suitcase, then doing the same with the next country. When wife and husband realize that there is a difference in perception husband is deflated so wife sets out to show him that it is all for the best.

Cast: 2
(husband and wife)

Set, lighting, sound: standard

Props: phone, very large atlas, large sign “INCOME TAX REFUND”, suitcase, clothing of each country

Special instructions:
Information about the individual countries can be found on the internet at locations such as:
http://www.emusic.com/album/Various-Artists-The-Orchard-Kenya-Music-Sampler-MP3-Download/10882330.html
http://www.terrabrasileira.net/folclore/manifesto/trajes.html

Sample of script:

wife is at downstage center, talking on the phone, excited, animated, pointing to various pages of atlas

Laurie: Oh Betty, it is going to be so exciting! I just got the letter in the mail today from somebody by the name of Anthony Revenue, at Missions Headquarters. We have our missionaries from Japan, Romania, Kenya and Brazil coming . . and there will also be a missionary to the native American tribe coming as well!
(pauses, listening)
I know, and the missionaries will be bringing stories of the countries and the people, they will even have some artefacts from each country.
(pauses, picks up a very large atlas, leafs through it)
I know Betty, you won’t want to miss a single conference destination.

Lawrence comes upstage, sees that Laurie is on the phone, so starts to move off stage, Laurie speaks so he starts to listen

Laurie: Can you believe it? Five countries in just (number of days of missions conference) days!
(pauses)
No Lawrence doesn’t know a thing about it, like I said, the letter in the mail from this . . Revenue guy, . . just came today . . Oh Lawrence will just be so excited!
(pauses)
Of course we can afford it; the news today is just such a blessing! I know Lawrence kind of holds on to his money with both hands, but he is going to be just like wild and happy about the letter from this Revenue guy.

Lawrence has confused look, then “light comes on” and he holds up sign “INCOME TAX REFUND”

Laurie: I tell you, if I know Lawrence, and after all these years of marriage I for sure do . . . he’ll be soooo excited!

Lawrence excited, picks up suitcase
Laurie, points to atlas:
The first stop is Japan! You know how delightful the Japanese people are . .

Lawrence puts on a Japanese hat, bows serenely, Japanese style in all directions

Laurie, points to atlas:
And then off to Romania . .

Lawrence puts hat in suitcase, takes out colourful vest, puts on vest

Laurie: The Romanian people are so . . alive, so energetic, . . . so animated!

Lawrence begins dancing wildly

Missions conference promotion.
Wife is on phone talking to a friend about upcoming missions conference and the places where the missionaries are coming from. The husband wrongly assumes they are getting a lot of money, and that his wife is going to surprise him with a whirlwind holiday around the world.

Cast: 2 m & f

• Wife
• Husband

Bible Reference: Mark 16:15

Set: standard

Sound: wireless mics if available

Song: none

Lighting: standard

SFX: none

Props:

• phone, very large atlas, large sign “INCOME TAX REFUND”, suitcase, clothing of each country

Costumes: standard

Special Instructions:

• Information about the individual countries can be found on the internet at various locations
• As the wife talks of the different countries the husband mimes “putting on” the feelings, music, activities (dances) of the region, then “taking off” that activity and “packing it” in a suitcase, then doing the same with the next country. When wife and husband realize that there is a difference in perception husband is deflated so wife sets out to show him that it is all for the best.

Time: 8

Sample of script:

wife on phone, excited pointing to various pages of atlas

Laurie: Oh Betty, it is going to be so exciting! I just got the letter in the mail today from somebody by the name of Anthony Revenue, at Missions Headquarters. We have our missionaries from Japan, Romania, Kenya and Brazil coming . . and there will also be a missionary to the native American tribe coming as well!
(pauses, listening)
I know, and the missionaries will be bringing stories of the countries and the people, they will even have some artefacts from each country.
(pauses, picks up a very large atlas, leafs through it)
I know Betty, you won't want to miss a single conference destination.

Lawrence comes upstage, sees that Laurie is on the phone, so starts to move off stage, Laurie speaks so he starts to listen

Laurie: Can you believe it? Five countries in just (number of days of missions conference) days!
(pauses)
No Lawrence doesn’t know a thing about it, like I said, the letter in the mail from this . . Revenue guy, . . just came today . . Oh Lawrence will just be so excited!
(pauses)
Of course we can afford it; the news today is just such a blessing! I know Lawrence kind of holds on to his money with both hands, but he is going to be just like wild and happy about the letter from this Revenue guy.

Lawrence has confused look, then “light comes on” and he holds up sign “INCOME TAX REFUND”

Laurie: I tell you, if I know Lawrence, and after all these years of marriage I for sure do . . . he’ll be soooo excited!

Lawrence excited, picks up suitcasLaurie, points to atlas:
The first stop is Japan! You know how delightful the Japanese people are . .

Lawrence puts on Japanese hat, bows Japanese style in all directions

Laurie, points to atlas:
And then off to Romania . .

Lawrence puts hat in suitcase, takes out colourful vest, puts on vest

Laurie: The Romanian people are so . . alive, so energetic, . . . so animated!

Lawrence begins dancing wildly